A Positive Voice

I can not get myself organised to write this regularly at the moment. Summer is coming to an end here, less than two weeks before the schools go back and we're trying to readjust to that life, but my body is resisting. I'm struggling to tread water when I just want to let the current pull me along. It doesn't help that I have this weird ear pressure problem that won't clear. 

I was speaking to my writing group about this question of self-belief in one's writing I discussed in my last post and they pointed out that I was lucky to have a positive first creative writing teacher, positive early role models in general. They felt, and I now agree, that the first voices you hear as a child or young person about your self-worth stick with you. If those people, parents, teachers, mentors, were over-critical or negative, that soundtrack will follow you throughout your life. If they were positive, it gives you a bolster of belief that could help support you when things are difficult. It's worrying as a parent and a teacher to understand how much weight the words we speak to children have throughout their lives. 

It is one of the reasons I love teaching creative writing and why I'm struggling with the idea of going into just regular teaching. As a special creative writing teacher, I could focus on just that, be the positive voice who loved their childish leaps into imagination amidst the classroom teacher's worries and critiques of handwriting and spelling. As a classroom teacher, I wouldn't have that time to focus on what I love because there's so many other things that I need to do just to get through the day. As a substitute I have even less time to get to know the students because I am usually just trying to get through the lesson and keep a semblance of control. I've had one or two sparks of it, but most of it feels again like just pushing against the weight of water to stay afloat.

I have an interview coming up for a new role, away from teaching. I'm walking that tightrope of trying to be positive and not get my hopes up. Everything is moving slowly as well which is difficult. It's 2 weeks before my interview. It could be a chance to move back towards supporting writers in a new way which would feel like a positive direction for myself as well. This summer has been heavy with a lot of doubt and questioning which hasn't helped with forward movement. 

I'm focusing on finishing my coursework and getting the kids ready to go back to school. And doing lots of editing, not many new poems are being written, but I'm finishing up a bunch of those poems I've written in my last few courses. 

I joined the Helsinki Poetry Connection for an open mike night this week. My first in Finland and my first in at least 10 years. I'm well out of practice, but it was a good laugh as a few friends from my group also braved the experience and did amazing. Open mikes are the same in the US, UK and Finland in my experience. It all depends on the crowd, but there's usually a good sense of support, some fun, funny and downright crazy readers. It's a weird experience in another language. My Finnish is just not good enough to follow the poems, but I love listening to the sound of it and how everyone made it do different things. Helsinki Poetry Connection was welcoming and multi-cultural, so I didn't feel strange reading in English. I'll definitely do it again. 

A few other bits of good news: Emerge Literary Journal has published my poem 'Growing Through the Sidewalk'.

My poem 'Without Finnish Idioms' won Wax Poetry Art's European Poetry Competition and was the first, and currently the only, poem published in their new online magazine Europe Poetry Magazine. This was one of the poems I read at the open mike. It was fun to see if the Finns reacted to my translations of Finnish idioms. 

And 'Cafe Dreams' is in the current issue of dreams walking, a new magazine with some great work.

Check them all out. 

Things just keep ticking along. Autumn will be here before we know it. Keep positive.

Writing with Monkeys

It's the summer holidays here, kids everywhere and I don't know if I'm coming or going with my writing. We've all been sick with various bugs so I've been too tired or ill to focus much on the Wendy Pratt course I've joined though I'm enjoying the different focus of the prompts. I'm not able to write every day, but I'm trying to grab time here and there. I hate not being able to join in on the Facebook page as much as I would like, though we had a good online group chat last week. Wendy's releasing a new course soon, so keep an eye on her site for details. 

The current course is focussing on 'Writing with a Beginner's Mind,' offering techniques that help you lose that critical voice that often plagues writers, the worries that the work isn't good enough, the guilt that we never will be able to balance our lives and writing. I do struggle with the later most, trying to be a single parent and a writer and find a real job to support my family has more than its share of guilt. I need to try Wendy's meditation and focus excercises more, my monkey brain has monkey brain and I can never turn all the noise off. Even more so with four monkeys climbing around the house. 

One of my favourite prompts so far has been to think about the idea of 'banned words' in poetry, words that are too dated, over-used, purple. I went and found a list of archaic words and wrote a poem playing with them. I love dictionaries and thesaurus and using them to find new words and meanings. It makes you see language in a new light. What do you think, should words like shard and gossamer be banned from contemporary poetry?

My poem 'Dripping Winter' has appeared in Crossways Literary Magazine. I hope you take a wander over and check out the issue and maybe purchase a hard copy.

And finally, Happenstance Press is having an interesting challenge to write a rhyming poem on a wrapper. I'm not very good with rhymes, but thought I could try something short, maybe with some Finnish words. What rhymes with suklaa?

Found in Poetry

I had a poem published last week in The Writer's Cafe Magazine's 'Letters' issue. I enjoyed reading through the issue as I saw a few names I recognised, new and old friends, but also was introduced to some new names by their poems. The theme offered so many avenues for exploration and each poet seemed to find their own unique way. Thanks to The Writer's Cafe team for sharing my work and that of others.

My poem was quite fun to 'write' as it was a found poem based on a series of letters I wrote when I was 18 and had moved abroad to Norway. It was my first time living away from my family and my first time living in a foreign country. It has obviously set the tone for the rest of my life. It was amusing to read my teenage thoughts and interests again. I'm so glad my mum kept the letters. 

Found poetry can be a good way to kick-start your writing if you're in a slump. Find a text that inspires or stimulates you somehow and pull out the phrases and words that feel like a poem to you. The theme can follow the original text or it can veer off in whatever direction you want. 

Dave Bonta of Via Negativa has been following this idea with his erasure poems, a type of found poetry, written using The Diary of Samuel Pepys. An erasure poem lifts words and phrases directly and doesn't add or change anything to make the poem work. Worth having a peruse to see how he does it, simple but evocative poems appearing from old words. Of course, credit the original author and text.

And thanks to Dave Bonta by the way for featuring my blog on his weekly round-up of the Poetry Blogging Network. I wrote the paragraph above before I checked out his blog, so total coincidence that he is appearing twice in my blog. 

It was quite a shock to bumble upon my own words this morning on a blog I read regularly. I was touched to be included in this community of poets who are working to share their love of poetry and also their struggles with working in the medium. I've been following the links from Dave's round-up regularly and have added a few of my fellow bloggers to my reading list.

Other news in the week, another acceptance and lots of rejections. I'm debating applying for a fellowship, the Alpine Fellowship. It's a relatively simple one, no application forms, no justifying why you deserve it, no seeking references. Just submit your writing on the theme. But the poems I'm considering submitting are tied up with other submissions and they want unpublished work, so I either need to come up with something new or hope the poems are rejected in time by the magazines currently considering them. If they're not, I'll bookmark the Fellowship for next year and give myself more time to sort things. 

Lots of links for you to follow this week. Enjoy.

Resolutions and 2017 Report

It's almost mid-January and I'm just getting around to posting a review of my writing year and to making resolutions. As usual they are pretty vague and extension to what I'm already doing in my writing: I want to write more, submit more and hopefully get published more.

In more detail: I have one poem to finish for my Scottish collection, then I will edit it and start seeking a publisher. I need probably another 10-15 poems for my Finnish collection to do the same. I still want a publisher for my first novel and hope to finish the rewriting of my second so I can look to editing it.

I also want to submit more work to magazines and journals. I have a routine in place for this, so that hopefully won't be too hard to keep up.

I'd also like to do some public performances this year. It's been a long time since I've read to an audience and while I loathe it and am not comfortable doing it, it's important when promoting your work, so I'd like to get back in the swing of it.

I'd like to consider getting back into teaching for next autumn. I'm not sure where or how, but there must be even a small audience out there interested in learning about creative writing in English here.

Stats Report for 2017

I didn't quite make my target of 100 rejections this year, but I submitted to 65 magazines and anthologies and made 12 book or chapter submissions to competitions or book publishers. I have also made 2 grant applications.

I have had 7 acceptances, 13 poems in total published. I also made the long-list for a first chapter competition. So that's 72 rejections for 2017.

On the writing side I have written 19 new poems and finished 9 poems that I had started in previous years. That is compared to 7 poems finished in total in 2016. I honestly think that's the most I've ever written in one year with 2003 just beating it with 25 poems.

I also added thousands of words to my second novel, though I didn't keep track of how many.

It looks good when you break it down and it's one of the reasons I have been keeping track of these little stats. It gives me a little boost for the upcoming year. 

How did 2017 work out for you? Do you have plans in place for new year. I often make a list using the 'I want to write . . .' prompt, so I can see what poems I have in mind to write and what I need to finish. 

Welcome to 2018, may it be a prosperous one, full of beautiful words and plot turns enough to keep us writing. 

Competitions and Awards

For years, I've always been uncertain about whether to apply to writing competitions. Most of them cost something to enter, whether it be £5 for a poem or £25 for a novel or poetry collection samples. I've always disliked paying as the chances of winning are pretty slim. While I don't begrudge the magazine or publisher using competitions to top up their limited incomes as I know how difficult it is to keep on top of the bills these days, I also have to think of my own bank balance. I don't pay to submit my work to magazines either. So I've tended to enter no fee ones or competitions that allow 2 or more poems for one small fee.

I have never known what type of poems to submit to competitions. What are the judges looking for, how do I know if my poems are competition material? They say read the previous winners, but judges change yearly with most competitions, so it's kind of impossible. I've basically decided not to entry single poem competitions unless they're free.

However, I've been entering more expensive competitions lately for my finished novel or for pamphlet or poetry collection competitions. With my novel, I figure the more people I can get to read it the better, as word of mouth is important in the publishing world, getting your name out there. But also winning or being short-listed for a competition, even for the first chapter or a section would help getting it published. I've been aiming for competitions that are connected to agencies or publishers and include being published or given a free critical feedback of my novel as a prize.

Publication for my poetry collection is also my aim. Pamphlets are harder as I'm again never sure what kind of pamphlet will grab the judges, but I occasionally submit to them. In the past two years I've applied to 11 competitions for my novel and poetry and have had my novel long-listed for two competitions which is encouraging, but I've never come any closer to winning.

I've also recently applied to a couple of awards which instead of giving prizes based solely on your writing they focus on your need or situation. I've applied for one for artists who are also parents and one for a grant to help pay for a place at a writer's retreat. Both are closed now, but Aerogramme Studio is a good place to find more these awards. These are not something I've ever considered applying for, but part of my push back into the writing world is to jump at new opportunities in order to get my work seen.

The application process for these awards is often complicated; long applications, finding referees and prepping your work to their specifications. It's good practice even if you don't think you have a chance to win. If you apply for grants for projects or awards from Arts Councils the procedure is similar, luckily I have some experience with them. 

I find the challenge of finding an appropriate poem or novel section is a good practice for looking critically at your work and to consider yourself as more than a closet scribbler. Get your work and name out there. And you never know you might win something. Good luck.